c.rimson. l.otus.

Before I say anything else, WBC = Westboro Baptist Church…..or something like that. I don’t really care. I just wanna complain about them.

I’ll start it off with THE WBC IS A BUNCH OF INSANE PEOPLE OMGGG. They basically hate everyone who’s not like them. I’m just like “wtf do you think you are, the KKK?” SERIOUSLY. I have never ever been so enraged, embarrassed and ashamed as a Christian IN MY LIFE.

They hate Catholics, they hate Jews, they hate gay people, they hate soldiers, they hate EVERYONE. And do they honestly believe that they’re following the scriptures and commandments by saying that God hates the world and is bringing wrath upon us? Really now? If I remember, the most important commandment that leads to the other 9 commandments says to love God and no other gods. Well if you really love God, you’ll also love and appreciate his creations.

Seriously, I was TRYING not to hate cause like I don’t want to generalize too much. Who knows, there might be like ONE good person amongst them but then again, what good would that do? They’re so freakin retarded omgg I can’t believe there are even people like that, the KKK was enoughhhh GAHH. We don’t need more religiously psychotic people, seriouslyyyy ToT it’s so annoying and maddening and makes me go gahh to no end~ >___<;;

You can search them up on youtube for the most retarded hilarious things and they WILL enrage you. Get your meds ready.

I know it’s been like what, only like 2 (not even) or so days since my breakup ToT I’m sorry to say I wasn’t feeling upset at all. It’s a situation that I call: He was waving the white flag, taunting me with it, I just karate chopped his arm so that it would finally just fall down onto the ring. So yeah. No regrets. It seems like he’s upset, though. Well if you wanna come back, CHANGE XD that’s all I gotta say.

Anyways, a certain someone asked me today (or technically, yesterday haha) to be his “wifey”. I thought this was a hilarious joke but no. That scary part is that he was serious. What’s even more scary is his horde of Korean fangirls who are about to glare at me with their stiletto heels and caked makeup. Ah yeah. I’m dead, aren’t I? He seems to be pretty serious though like in the good way, despite the long distanceness…..which I find very saddening. We’ll have to see how this plays out.

you shoulda loved me right when you had me
shoulda shoulda but you didn’t did ya
you shoulda known I’m not gonna sit around and wait for you
to get your act together
shoulda known better
don’t say you wanna
don’t say you were gonna
you shoulda loved me right but you didn’t did ya

— Did Ya [BoA]

SELF-EXPLANATORY XD but self-explanatory with no regrets, only freedom.

“Remember, nothing should be with regret. For everything that has happened in the past has made you who you are now.”

“Between the good and bad’s where you’ll find me, reaching for heaven. I will fight and I’ll sleep when I die. I live my life, I’M ALIVE”

Hells yeah and I appreciate who I am. And as long as I’m alive, I’m gonna do something helpful with this life, it shall not go to waste or die in vain.

It suddenly became a huge thing on fb O.o why? I will never know. The idea is interesting, although I’ve already heard a bunch of people bitching about how cowardly the people can be on formspring. Yes, I know. Cause they can be anonymous. They start complaing about you. Anonymously. Ah the power of anonymousness. What else do you expect them to say XDDD hey if a bunch of people are coming out and calling you a bitch, you probably are one, I’m sorry xD they wouldn’t call a nice person a bitch for no reason, especially a whole horde of people (unless of course it’s some kind of conspiracy >_>). Anyways, no such thing has happened to me yet. I actually want people to start complaining about me, just to see how it turns out XD cause I like owning haters xP I’ll be mad honest about it, I like crushing their verbal defenses.

Anyways, if you wanna complain or whatnot, anything, here it is:
my formspring – lucedicielo

Yes, that’s Italian xDD freakin Hitman Reborn has gotten me learning Italian @.@

And for the most randomness of reasons, I also have a twitter (probably out of boredom too =_=):
twitter – ashiiya_guren

I haven’t realized it until now, but I am officially a punching bag. I bring this up because I just had a so-called “argument” (can’t really find a better word right now) with my bf. It’s so damn frustrating and as much as I don’t wanna lose my cool (and I kind of didn’t until he had to leave to go to sleep), I can’t really help it as this point.

So basically it went like this (in a nutshell, I suppose):

me: what’s up with you today
bf: I don’t know and I don’t care
me: well it’s bothering me cause I care
-no response AT ALL until…-
me: you gonna sleep?
bf: sooner or later
me: oh now you respond
bf: I had nothing to say, you got me cornered
me: HA….so what, you felt shitty out of nowhere?
bf: I have no response
me: how is there no answer, you either do or you don’t….don’t tell me you don’t know =_=
bf: I said I have nothing to say, what more do you want
me: do you even honestly wanna talk to me right now, you’ve been cold dead
bf: to answer and knowing this is the wrong answer, no
me: what, did I do something?
bf: it’s just a no, you don’t need to ask
me: but I wanna know cause if I’m not the reason you’re like this, then why the freak am I being affected by it
bf: I don’t know, ask yourself
me: I’m wondering why you’re asking like this towards ME if I’m not the cause of this, why am I getting flamed
bf: ok forget it….I have to sleep, laters
me: what the freak? FINE THEN you coldhearted bastard

…is basically….how it went…..I understand that if something happened and you need to vent your feelings out, then you need to, you shouldn’t hold that in (like I freakin do). But that doesn’t mean you end up saying “I don’t wanna talk to you” like WHY, what part do I have in ANY of this, that you don’t wanna talk to me? He knows that I’m the type who he can just talk to about anything, so what the hell =__= also, I left out a little thing he said that “you just got caught in the crossfire, as they say” umm NO I DIDN’T cause I’m practically the only person he vents out to. Does he take it out on his family? No. He doesn’t even talk to them about it. Does he talk to friends about it? No. So in the end, I’m the only freakin person listening to him like this, taking all these hits. And I seriously cannot figure out why. If it was really my fault, then I wanted to do something about it and fix it. But it’s not. So umm….WTF.

So back the idea of the punching bag. Basically, he might be doing this (not only cause I’m like the only person who hears him out) cause I’m the type to just listen and say “it’s all ok”….something like that xD like I don’t argue with someone who’s upset cause that’ll just make it worse (unless they’re seriously screwed up =_=). So when I thought about it, I was like “wow, I’m like a punching bag, I’m just taking all the hits and not saying a word”…usually xD but then, even tough punching bags can only take so much. Eventually, they start tearing a little and denting in places. And at the very end, the chain just breaks and it falls down. I’m kind of thinking that’s what’s gonna happen to me….eventually. I’m not gonna be able to just absorb all this in forever. I’m gonna have to explode at some point. After all, I’m human, too. I have emotions, too (well actually, if you think about it, this guy was more like….he didn’t have emotions). And I’m sorry for being what I’m supposed to be, a human with emotions.

OMFG THIS MOVIE WAS SO AWESOME XD and no, it wasn’t too much like Harry Potter just because there’s two guys and one girl =_= come on, how many stories are like that? A LOT. Anyways, I like how they put so much Greek mythology into it, there was like nymphs and everything but it was so interesting to see mythology play out in a modern setting, in the city xD

I think the actors played their parts really well in general and so were the graphics O.o god it was awesome seeing Percy use his powers, it was so epic xD also, if you consider the budget, it was really good. There were times when I was comparing this to my perception of Greek gods that I got from watching Disney’s Hercules xD bad idea.

One thing I really loved about this movie was how funny it was. Grover especially. He kind of reminded me of Donkey from Shrek, only he wasn’t as talkative/annoying xDD oh and the trip to the Underworld? Funny as hell~ (wait till you see Hades, I laughed xDD) I’d have to say that one of my favorite parts was when they killed Medusa. Speaking of which, Medusa was done really well. Although if you wanna get technical, she was supposed to have been killed by Perseus (cough cough Percy cough) in old times (and then have Pegasus magically spring out from her neck), but eh, it was still mad awesome xD

I do hope they continue the Percy Jackson series. Since unlike Harry Potter, each book is a whole separate adventure.

RECOMMENDED~~ …if you like this kind of stuff

If you don’t know what a smartphone is in this world, people would pretty much think you’re an idiot. Almost everyone has one and if you don’t, some people -surprisingly- laugh at you. I will admit that they’re pretty awesome inventions that can do a great amount of things. It’s like a swiss knife deshou. Besides calling and messaging, you got internet all over the place with people going crazy for apps. You can stay connected and if you’re a business person, you can basically work wherever you are. They have their many uses, but a lot of this is abused and cause people to be lazy, as with a lot of advanced technology.

I love technology and all, I just don’t love it when it’s being used like drugs or something. People of all ages have their heads buried and is the cause of many deaths (and as you know, many bad grades). This “swiss knife” idea for these smartphones have caused people to expect a little too much from any device that’s similar. For example, if you have two completely different smartphones that are for different things, many people will compare them and say that one sucks because there’s too many buttons or that it’s a bit slow. I for one think that buttons are necessary, but that’s besides the point.

I bring this up because I was just watching a short little Korean thing on smartphones and how amazingly uber awesome they are and how rich and famous people need them in their lives, too (and is basically poking at you to get one). Funny thing is, the only phone they really showed is the iPhone, but that is also besides the point (or is it). These people were like “oh no, I can’t possibly live without my smartphone, it does everything for me and it’s such a time killer”. Yeah, I love time killers, too. Here’s the interesting bit: “When I moved from America to Korea, I didn’t have to bring my home phone with me since I have my smartphone. In the future, since smartphones can already act as a tv and computer, you wouldn’t need to carry around tvs and computers with you, it’s such a hassle” (and if you need to know, this was said by JYP). It sounds so convenient~ ….=_____=;; I mean, the thought’s not bad, but it just sounds like people are trying to get around life even more than they are now, making it “more comfortable”. If you think about the less fortunate in other countries now and told them that, they’d think you’re spoiled and ridiculous, which we are. I’m lucky to be typing on this computer now. I didn’t even have my first phone until last summer. Maybe that’s why I’m so egh about this.

Either way, point is, people take tech for granted and although they’re awesome, it’s just way too much =_=

So yeah, school started last week for me….”today” (mon) was only my second day of school and you’ll see why xDDD but yeah I’m pretty content with my schedule :DD I actually just changed one of my classes today cause the music class I went to today….hmm, it just wasn’t cutting it XD I signed up for the wrong teacher so yeah….anyways, my classes are as follows:

GEOL 012 – Natural Disasters: This is what I replaced my music class with XDDD HAHAHA. It was one of the only classes available in that time slot. It sound interesting anyways, I have a big thing for science xP we all know ima fail.

ENGL 110 – College Writing: I’m actually studying right now for this, which used to be an unthinkable thing xD making index cards to study pft. But it’s ok, the prof is pretty funny xD and is constantly emailing us =_=;;

PSCI 101 – Intro to Political Science: Another thing I love is politics….but not the politicians XD even this novel we’re reading on politics is interesting, it brings up interesting things about the government (simply because it’s from a rebellious standpoint XD). And I’d love to talk about the political issues now HEHEHE.

ANTH 101 – Intro the Cultural Anthropology: Surprisingly, our prof is Japanese O.o you don’t know how happy I was during that whole class xD it’s kind of boring, but I met two friends from hs so I’m good :DDDD no hw, but many tiny quizzes, a midterm and final. Of course, that mean we have to read to no end =_= I have to read 4 chapters for next week >o< gaaaahhh

As for my schedule....

MON: GEOL 1:40 – 2:55pm; PSCI 3:05 – 4:20pm; ANTH 6:30 – 7:45pm
TUES: ENGL 2:40 – 4:30pm
WED: same as mon
THURS: same as tues
FRI: freeeeeeeeeeee

Except for the fact that I have work on thurs morning starting at 9am =___= GAH.

Oh yeah, before fans and antis start yelling at me, I’m talking from a point of like neutrality here. I don’t love or hate her, I just think she has good and bad points, like every human does.

Good points ::

* she actually has a great voice
* dances pretty well
* has a strange style
* mvs that have a story

Bad points ::

* background (which doesn’t matter as much at this point)
* theme of many of her songs

Alright so there were some pictures going around and even an article in the freakin Korean newspaper about how she looks like without makeup. And I go WHO THE FREAK CARES???? For one thing, pretty much every celebrity around the whole friggin world (yes, even the guys) has makeup on. Seriously, why wouldn’t they put on so much, especially in these times where it’s pretty much a requirement to put on makeup at the workplace? It’d be weird if they didn’t. And do you expect them to look ~stunning~ without makeup? What planet do you live on? Who says stars have to look all naturally pretty? Of course they’re gonna have masks painted on them for mvs and showings and such. I don’t complain about that so long as they have talent and Lady Gaga does have some talent, in my opinion.

I know her previous years of life weren’t that great, but whatever, she’s put that pretty much behind her and she’s a dediated singer now who has a great voice. At first she seemed typical and run-off-the-mill to me, but after a couple mvs and songs, she wasn’t that bad. But honestly, even the young girls on the street have clown masks on them and if you were to spray mad water on them, you’d think they were different people, too. Seriously. And also, makeup is sometimes a thing of art. In Lady Gaga’s case, it’s all about the art and how the makeup looks in general, like the style and colors and how it goes with the clothes, not really about making her look younger or whatever. Sure, she ends up looking pretty, but it’s really about the artness of it.

So whatever, if you still think that she’s an ugly no-personality hag, then that’s what your narrow-minded brain thinks and I have nothing to do with it.

The first decade of the millennium has already ended…..I just had to say it the epic way XD but really, a whole decade has already gone by and I’m in college now I feel so olddd ToT I remember when it was 2000, I was like what, 4th grade? GAAHHHH XD

Forgetting about the new year for a while, it’s time to look back on the past decade and see what we’ve accomplished. Let’s see…..a pointless war, lots of paranoia + xenophobia, and many celebrity deaths around the whole freakin world. Can we look at the positive things for a moment =.=” well we’ve advanced in technology as if we went through a time warp. Like seriously. Even in like 2004, cell phones were monochrome, fat and all with antennas. Now we got touchscreen smartphones popping out left and right. Macs back then were cutely round and colorful desktops. Now they’re seen as the epitome of computers. MP3 players had like 256mb (or whatever the number was) of memory, was bulky with no color screens and the like. Now we have things like the iPod Touch with 32GB stalking us. It’s been tech-crazy this decade.

Moving away from the techness, at the end of the decade, we have elected our first “black president”. I’m not going into the whole technical thing about how he’s not all completely black, it doesn’t matter. Honestly, how many people would’ve known that? Even I didn’t know before until people started yelling it out as if they were protesting…..bunch of losers *rolleyes* seriously though, the “majority” of America has finally looked past skin color. Racism is seriously an old habit and is just UGH now, but that’s a whole other rant for another time x]]

In terms of fashion, that’s certainly been a fun house, too. 80’s fashion is creeping around again and Asia has officially gone awry with ideal boyfriends being a guy that’s prettier than his girlfriend. Which I don’t mind. It’s funny, actually. My only complaint is that girls have become rape magnets but that’s their problem, not mine.

Now in terms of music, it’s just gone DOWN. In the early 2000s, music was mad good, even in America. But now, not so much. Unless you’re like those rock bands *cough cough Linkin Park cough* or like Lady Gaga (also gonna be another separate topic), you just aren’t gonna stand out. Some of the long standing artists like Kelly Clarkson and Beyonce are also respectable and still going strong with worthwhile songs. But the new artists popping up are just like ugh stop making my ears bleed. Even in Asia, they’re resorted to nothing but repetitive club and ballad music. They don’t really praise (or just even accept) things like rock. I’m not just saying that cause I like rock (it’s the BEST XD) but in general, a country made up of nothing but dance and ballad isn’t really that great. You need diversity in music, too~~ a great mix is always awesome ;P I just don’t understand why Asia (alright, well…..KOREA to be more specific, since China and Japan are like rock rockkk) doesn’t like rock so much. I mean, they act all “excited” when there’s a rock band, but really, none of their faces really say “I’m liking this”. And there are some really great rock artists in Korea that I love. It’s really a shame and a waste =.=;; what these people really wanna see is more pointless girl groups and club music that has no meaning whatsoever.

Getting off topic xDDD ….but yeah. From my point of view, decade hasn’t been the best in general, like global-wise. As for my personal life, it’s been the time in my life that had the most change cause it’s when all the graduations happened and when all the core friendships were made and when I went through all the teen drama XD life-wise, it was awesome ^^